Taking Responsibility for Our Lives.The Authors Collection.

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Recently I saw a t-shirt advertised in one of those catchall catalogues that come in the mail. Across the top of the shirt it said: Commas save lives. It was followed by two short sentences to prove the point:

Let’s eat Grandmother.

Let’s eat, Grandmother.

Christina Carson
Christina Carson

Rules have been around for seeming forever whether they refer to grammar or etiquette, social mores or legality. Almost anyone can make a case for rules. They give us a sense of order and continuity in our day to day lives….to a point. Beyond that, their impact becomes repressive.

Carl Sagan, cosmologist and astronomer, once said, “We make our world significant by the courage of our questions and by the depth of our answers.”

Here then is a two-fold question that begs a serious look: When do rules begin to diminish society and what is the nature of that deterioration?

Here’s what I’ve seen over my lifetime. I’ve noticed a proliferation of rules at every level of society and a waning, almost to the point of extinction, of our willingness or interest in assuming responsibility for our lives as a whole. Do I see those two things as interrelated? I do. We’ve been willing to trade that sense of freedom and vitality that remains alive in those who take responsibility for their choices and actions for the seeming safety of being taken care of.

responsibilityI remember a night when Bert and I at a Wednesday night study class at a church in our community raised the question of taking responsibility for one’s life. It practically threw the ranks into rebellion. People were more afraid of that notion than the plague. What pained me was knowing all we forego when we are more focused on assigning and casting blame than on resolving the inherent problem, which is possible when all involved take responsibility for themselves. With commitment to personal responsibility comes the most powerful means of bringing people together and healing the pain of errors that naturally occur. We are safer in the company of people of their word than when we are among rule followers. Yet we didn’t get any takers that night. One rarely does.

If you think I’m making an issue out of nothing, here is one more question for you to consider: When was the last time you heard someone, anyone choose to stand before his or her boss, mate or child and take responsibility for their actions rather than assess blame?  We might need the rules of grammar to protect Grandmother, but what’s to become of us as a people if our developmental progress favors being taken care of as opposed to the self-determination, optimism and creativity that accrue to those committed to personal responsibility in their lives.

SufferTheLittleChildren-3dLeft

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  • Caleb Pirtle

    A very timely post, Christina. I listen to the news, and it seems that we live in an age when passing the buck has become a national pastime. We are responsible for what we do, good or bad. But so many take credit when moments of life turns out good and dish out blame when life doesn’t.

    • Christina Carson

      It appears on the surface you can have it both ways, but there are still many of us who recognize fools.

  • Darlene Jones

    I think our society is over-regulated and I find it sad that that seems to be the only way we can function.

    • Christina Carson

      It definitely makes for a ponderous life. That’s one thing I loved about the far north. Not only did people take responsibility for their lives, they also told the RCMP on a regular basis to butt out ,

      • Darlene Jones

        Aw, poor policemen!

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